Sunday, December 13, 2009

An angel and a demon

Little Liam is not so little anymore! He is 2 months old and 12 pounds now! He is already in 3 month clothing and he pushes his head up, smiles and coos. He really is an angel baby and hardly ever cries!
On another note, Kennedy has been acting like a little demon lately! It is not just her being 2 years old either! She is so hyperactive and challenging! Saturday at about 1:30 am, I went into her room and she was still awake!!! No lie! I started a new routine where I bathe her and then read to her til a timer goes off. Then I say goodnight and leave. She tries for about an hour to come out asking for drinks, saying she is scared and lots of other excuses. I put her back in bed and leave. She always stays awake! Last night, she was still up reading a book at MIDNIGHT! My child is never tired! We woke her up earlier today to see if that will help, but I doubt it. She will just nap and then stay up late again. It is horrible! She also loves to climb on the counters to get whatever she wants instead of asking. She thinks she can do everything alone. Here I am, a graduate of college with a bachelors in Early Childhood education and I can't get my own kid to go to bed or go potty! I tried all of the tricks that I learned in my classes and they DO NOT WORK! She is so independent and stubborn. I love her to death but man! I need some help from super nanny or something! (or from you if you have any advice!) Here is what I need help with...
1. She knows how to go pee and poo on the potty cause she does it when she wants to, but she prefers to go in her pull up and then ask to have a new pull up when she goes in it! We tried treats, but she does not seem to care what the prize is.
2. SHE NEVER GOES TO BED NO MATTER WHAT WE TRY!!!
3. She won't ever sit still to eat. We can't take her anywhere cause she just wants to run around instead of eat. If we try to hold her in her seat she will just scream bloody murder. We don't want to bother other people so we let her go!
4. She has bad tantrums...like lays down and kicks the floor screaming. I ignore her for now, but they don't seem to stop. She has even hit her head against the wall which makes her cry harder but she does it on purpose!
so, I am so happy I have an angel baby so that I can try to deal with Kennedy but really, my education is not helping me here! She is a funny girl and we love her. I just don't know if she needs medication or what!

5 comments:

Kathy Cline said...

Carli,

Independent is good. And don't say stubborn. Say determined or strong-willed. Believe it or not, they are great character traits that will benefit Kennedy her whole life long. My daughter Sarah was like Kennedy when she was little as far as getting upset and throwing fits on the floor at age 2. She would want something to go her way so badly and if it didn't, she would get mad and cry. She literally could not be calmed down.

When Sarah would start crying and I knew she wasn't hurt and she was just mad, I would say, "I don't like to hear loud screaming like that. Please go and cry in your room. When you're done you can come out. At first I would have to take her to her room and close the door. I never locked her in, just closed it. If she came out and was still screaming, I would take her back in and close the door and repeat about staying in her room until she was done. When I didn't hear any screaming any more, I'd go tell her she could come out if she hadn't already come out. After a while, she would go there herself when she was really mad or upset, cry awhile and then come out and play.

It's really important that you stay calm when she's upset no matter what. She's smart enough to reason with.

Here's the part you can look forward to. Strong-willed children are really good at sticking to what they decide despite peer pressure, including standards, and they are great at disciplining themselves when they get older. I almost never have to tell Sarah to clean her room or do her homework, and she gets good grades. They are usually leaders.

It's the laid-back ones you have to bug about stuff because they don't care.

About the potty training. I wouldn't worry too much. When she decides she actually wants to, she'll do it. She's had the household and her routines disrupted, new baby and all. You could try putting her in cloth training pants so she can feel the wetness and messiness more...some kids HATE that. Or just have her routinely sit on the potty each day about the time she has to poo, and while she's sitting, read to her. Then if she does go, praise like crazy. If she doesn't, say...oh nothing today...maybe tomorrow. With Brittany we had a potty card. A little colored index card. Whenever she went pee or poo in the potty, she got a little sticker on it. She knew that when it was full, she could get something she really wanted. It was usually a trip out with Mom and Dad to get ice cream, but you know what Kennedy likes. With my nephew it was smoke bombs and sparklers when he went in the potty. He'd do anything to get to set off a smoke bomb.

Hope that gives you an idea or two to try. Just love her, don't label her, and try to stay calm.

Good luck!

Love, Sis. Cline

Sarah said...

I hate to say it, and you won't like hearing it... but you have to drop the nap all together. She's one of those kids who can do really well on less sleep. I have one just like her! I totally agree with Kathy, and I'm really looking forward to the later years when Lincoln can lead without getting into trouble because he's so young. You know what I mean about that! These kids have amazing tenacity for a reason... they NEED it to handle life nowadays, and not buckle under pressure! :)
As for potty training, put her in big girl panties that you two pick out together. Just you and her, too, have Christian watch Liam for a few hours and have a fun mommy daughter date. I have a feeling that she's acting out more because she really has had her LIFE interrupted. Not like nobody else has, but it's much much easier for adults to understand and be happy about! I'm sure the novelty has worn off for her (quite some time ago) and she just wants life back the way it was. If only it were that easy! :)
I like what Kathy said about the tantrums. They are obviously for attention, that's why kids have them. She needs to learn how to communicate to you better through words and not fits. So I would try what Kathy suggested.
I still have problems with getting both kids to sit and eat! I'm thinking about maybe getting them more involved somehow in the process of MAKING the food and getting them excited about eating it, maybe that will work. Every child is different, but I've found as a general rule that if they are excited about something, they will darn sure do it almost 100% of the time! It's all about consistency, and I know how difficult that can be at times! It's so much esier to be lazy and let them do whatever, but that for sure will come and bite you in the butt come the teenage years! Good luck! I hope you find something that works for your cute Kennedy!

Clayton & Company said...

i will share a book with you that my sister gave to me. it is called "Raising your spirited child: A guide for parents whose child is more intense, sensitive, perceptive, persistent, energetic". although books don't always solve every problem, this book gave me incredible insight, not only to Alex but also to myself. i have read it more than once and it's interesting to see how different each child can be and that parenting really does differ from one to the other. it will not solve all your problems but will definitely give you a new point of view. good luck.

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lizdye said...

Hey chica, well I dont know what you should do. I will tell you that my sister has her daughter clean up her own poop if she goes in her underwear, since it groses her daughter out, she will go in the pody so she doesnt have to clean it up. I dont know, maybe kennedy is too young for that though. Also, if she is screaming in public I would still just be consistent on making her sit down and eat, I have the same problem, and i just have to say to myself, "who cares what they think, its more important that Eddy learns his lesson" easier said than done, I know. Good luck! You can do it! My sister and I were just having this same conversation this morning. We decided that we are going to bring back spanking and yelling...its what they did in the old days and kids respected their parents...so much for being PC. lol!